The Attention Deficit Disorder Thread

Frodo n. An annoying little turd that clings to the ring. A Geetle that forces one to tap the ash

 

"I tried to cut off a length of dirty spine but ended up with a Frodo"

 

if a plant gets pissed on does it die?

 

no

 

does it smell?

 

yes

 

of piss

 

ive often wondered 'sall

 

Ive pissed on many a thing in my time; flowers, plants, trees, nettles, ferns, grass, mud, in forests, in rivers, in the sea, on the beach and in a bush to name but a few. You see, the innate feelings of man take great pleasure in urinating in the wilderness, as this was the way of his ancestors

 

oh ive done it outside manytimes
i was thinking about a house plant

 

lol ok

 

Im very bored you may be able to tell

 

yea me too!
and i need to piss now

 

I must have been absent minded when I entered this thread, because it's for those not paying attention, whereas I always pay attention.

 

there was a young girl from crewe
who declared as the bishop withdrew
the vicar was quicker, slicker and thicker
and 2 inches longer than you

 

FACTS
How empty is theory in the presence of fact!
- A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur's Court

Get your facts first, and then you can distort them as much as you please.
- quoted by Rudyard Kipling in From Sea to Shining Sea

We do not deal much in facts when we are contemplating ourselves.
- "Does the Race of Man Love a Lord?"

For a forgotten fact is news when it comes again.
- Following the Equator

I never saw an author who was aware that there is any dimensional difference between a fact and a surmise.
- quoted in My Father Mark Twain, Clara Clemens

Portrait of Clemens by Pach Bros.
from the
Dave Thomson collection

The mere knowledge of a fact is pale; but when you come to realize your fact, it takes on color. It is all the difference between hearing of a man being stabbed to the heart, and seeing it done.
- A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur's Court

I am not one of those who in expressing opinions confine themselves to facts. I don't know anything that mars good literature so completely as too much truth. Facts contain a great deal of poetry, but you can't use too many of them without damaging your literature. I love all literature, and as long as I am a doctor of literature--I have suggested to you for twenty years I have been diligently trying to improve my own literature, and now, by virtue of the University of Oxford, I mean to doctor everybody else's.
- Speech to the Savage Club, London, 7/6/1907

...if you are going to find out the facts of a thing, what's the sense in guessing out what ain't the facts and wasting ammunition? I didn't lose no sleep.
- Tom Sawyer, Detective

Always dress a fact in tights, never in an ulster.
- Life on the Mississippi

 

^^^

Does Uranus look big in that?

 

No, it's a gas giant. I was wondering about it once so I checked an astronomy site and they compared it to Neptune in size and make up.